Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Not as bad as it seems...

For all my complaining, recent and otherwise, it's not as bad as it seems. Yes, I have my ups and downs, but both valleys and mountains have their own kind of beauty and can be appreciated.

I remember moving from the Puget Sound area of Washington (Lynnwood to be exact) to Walla Walla, WA right before I started junior high. I fell asleep before we had cleared Snoqualamie pass and woke up outside of Tri-Cities, WA. The scenery had gone from green, lush, and salty ocean air to brown, dry, and arid. I had a mental freak out and couldn't understand why my parents had moved the family across the state from a seeming Eden-like flourishing green-ness to a barren wasteland. To my young eyes everything around me was dead. I soon came to realize that the farmland around me wasn't lifeless, but had matured and was ready for harvest. The initially perceived "dead plants" were actually fields of wheat. Now I can recognize the lushness of both kinds of scenery. Each is equally beautiful in my eyes and each serves a different purpose.
The same can be said about life. Balance. Yin and Yang. Dichotomies. Binaries. Everything has a counterbalance that is essential to truly understand and appreciate the other. I can't be truly happy without going through and understanding pain. I don't appreciate a good student paper until I read a bad one. Recognizing the beauty of the ocean and a desert only comes when you realize the necessity of the other.

Maybe I've waxed poetic right now...and yes, maybe I'm avoiding grading, but it's all true. I need to have the hard times, moments when I want to give up and quit, pain, confusion, anger, hurt, frustration, and other emotions I have been feeling lately, in order to appreciate the other things. Friends who have encouraged me, family who have lifted my spirits, the kindness of strangers, love from all, and the reassurance from those who are willing to kick the butt of those that hurt me. It's nice to know someone has your back.

So thank you for your comments, encouragement, and love -- vocal or silent. It's felt and appreciated.

1 comment:

Susan Allred said...

You know, my first memory of the Walla Walla area is the EXACT same way! I fell asleep just outside of Lynnwood, and woke up right around Touchet to all of the wheat fields and wanting to cry because I missed my pine trees. Mom and dad had moved us to a DESERT!! lol Funny what we remember.